Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Dreaming Big (Vickie- red)

I've been thinking a lot lately. I've been thinking of all these long monologues and all these amazing topics to write or speak about; everything to Lost!, how does that make sense?!?! to levels emotional and trauma release to how trauma changes our genome. But nothing feels right, to talk about yet at least. There are holes missing in my theories.

I've been scheming up a business plan for the past 6 weeks. I've only told a few people and everyone is absolutely thrilled to get involved. I have a lot of goals and dreams. I want to help myself. I want to dream big and learn what I am passionate about. I want to help people. I want to edify people. And I want to teach people to help themselves. When I am done at massage school, I eventually want to get a masters in genomics. Doing massage is mostly a way that I can pay my way through college. But it is also the yang to my yin. I LOVE "holistic medicine" but I am a die-hard believer in "mainstream" medicine too. Massage and genomics are my two counter weights. So, ultimately I want to open a bodywork clinic that brings the two together (mainstream medicine and holistic health) and also integrates trauma resolution into the mix.

The question is, how do you do something that society has been fighting against for 100 years, AND be successful?

I think I can do it. In fact I know I can. I really think that something like this is what I'm meant to do. To my delight, yesterday I learned that the dean of my program is starting a new course in "medical massage".... to do just that, integrate massage and holistic health into mainstream medicine. She is pioneering a program, the first in the nation.

I also came to a very interesting realization last night. I had a terrible time growing up, but what got me through was thinking that I was being tested and I was learning something valuable that I would need someday. I realized last night that the reason that I know I am going to be able to do this is because I've already had all (or much of at least) the experience I need to start this clinic and help others and be a pioneer in integration, AND do it while breaking every gender-social construct there is. Now that's dreaming big.

The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself, right?! (did I mention that I am terrified????)

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